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Last week for Frugal Date Friday, we talked about the importance of a weekly check-in. For a recap, a weekly check-in is when you sit down and talk about 5 particular questions. This helps you to both have realistic expectations for the week and solve problems before they can become a bigger issue.
The Standard Questions:
1. How did you feel loved this past week?
2. What does your upcoming week look like?
3. How would you feel most loved & encouraged in the days ahead?
4. How would you best feel pursued this week?
5. How can I pray for you or support you this week?
For quiet guys this can be tricky though. It can be hard to for them to know how to answer the questions and open up to discuss the answers. I am also married to a quiet guy and here are some tricks I’ve found to make this process healthier for both of us.
Stick To One Word Answers
Try setting both of you up for success and make the question word answer questions. For example, you could ask: What was the one thing you liked about last week? What meal did you enjoy the most?
Be Content With Short Answers
Another major component in making this work is to be content with short answers and not press for more. Never to follow up with why? After a short while of him seeing that you are doing well with short answers it helps him to not feel pressured on the answers. I’ve found they even tend to answer more.
My Favorite One Word Answer Question
Our one check-in question that he responds to the best… What in my day would you prefer me not to do and what would you rather me do? He always has something to say.
What tips do you have for getting your quiet spouse to open up?
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